Nintendo likes to do things a little different. I get that. Its drive to deliver fresh experiences that deviate from the norm is something to be admired because it dares to take risks far away from others who are content with the status quo. However, sometimes it can take this desire to be different a bit too far and 1-2 Switch is a prime example of how things go from being wonderfully unique to batshit crazy and just ludicrous.


1-2 Switch is a collection of strange games that are supposed to highlight the motion and vibration capabilities of the Joy Con controllers that come with the Nintendo Switch. One game involves milking a cow by simulating the grabbing of its udders with the controller. This is definitely on the high end of the weird scale of things. And then there’s the mini-game called Baby. What do you do in this game? Well just take a look:


That’s right. You have to cradle a baby so it stops crying and put it sleep. How is that any sane person’s idea of fun? I wonder why Nintendo  chose not to advertise this game being played on an airplane? Who in their right mind wants to ‘play’ this? Maybe if you’re a 3 year old little girl perhaps? The real question is, how much LSD did the developers at Nintendo take before signing off on this? Well the answer is probably a lot because this is just one example of a mini-game, if you can call it that, that is part and parcel of the 1-2 Switch package.


Milk gifEver watched Zoolander and wished that you could replicate Ben Stiller’s fabulous catwalk antics? Well now you can practice hard to realise your dreams courtesy of a mini-game that, from what I can tell, assesses how well you can rotate your hips? How this game works is really beyond me but the mere concept of it just bewilders me.

The other games aren’t so far off in the hilariously ridiculous stakes either. Shaving yourself. Answering your phone in Telephone (I shit you not). Replicating daily routines when you have a controller apparently elevates them from the status of chore to ‘fun’.

1-2 Switch Off

Shaving is so much fun...

Shaving is so much fun…

I like Nintendo’s often quirky ideas. They translate to something different and fun and can be a right laugh with mates. But Nintendo seem to have taken that way too far with this. What serious proposition does 1-2 Switch offer gaming fans? Compare this with Wii Sports on the original Wii that shipped with the console. It was functional and fun and had longevity. 1-2 Switch is something you play for a few minutes, laugh at and feel ashamed as you immediately down some bleach to make yourself forget that you ever tried such a thing. Surely there are other ways to show off the Joy Cons HD rumble features that don’t involve milking cows, cradling babies or wanking off the controller? Nintendo need to release a title that does exactly that in a more meaningful manner and one that doesn’t take the TV screen out of the picture either. 1-2 Switch just seems absurd and barely classifies as a game.

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Proprietor of and a die-hard gaming fan since I was old enough to hold a controller.

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1 Response

  1. Theodore Marvin "Ted" DiBiase says:

    This game should be a free / included with the Switch as a bundle.

    That said, the milk sub-game could be good practice for the wife….

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